Saturday, October 25, 2008

Two Damn Weeks

Two weeks. Two funerals. Two thefts. Oh, and two headcolds which have taken up residence in my chest leaving me without a single good night's sleep in...yes...two weeks.

I lent my laptop to a colleague at work who had it in her car when she stopped for an errand in Alexandria. When she got back hers was one of many cars that had been broken in to (and one was stolen) and of course, my laptop was gone.

This was not her fault. The fact is, someone came along and decided to take something that did not belong to them. That is theft. The victim is not to blame and I believe this continued belief that victims "ask for it" should be stopped immediately. Another colleague blames the economy. I blame parents and bleeding heart liberals who have raised an entire society of "something for nothing" people.

So, two weeks of wrangling with the insurance company.

Enter first headcold. Shivering, shaking, 24 hours of head misery before it wandered down to my chest. Oh...sigh...I know what this means. Bronchitis.

Then my Aunt Elli died. While not technically my "aunt" she was the closest thing to a sister my mother ever had, and like every good southern family (with a Yankee mom) we grew up calling her "Aunt Elli." I took my parts to the funeral - thankful for a lovely day and owning a convertible. Screw bronchitis. And thank god for abuterol inhalers and halls cough drops.

So this past Monday Chris gets an email from his sister. Her mother-in-law has died and the funeral is Wednesday. Being a good Southerner I am well aware of the following critical decision making facts:

1. Angie is reportedly closer to her mother-in-law than to her own mother. That's family.

2. Chris is the only "blood" family Angie has on the East Coast that Angie has not birthed out.

3. It is less than a 7 hour drive from Arlington, VA to Middletown, CT.

4. It's autumn. It's the East Coast and it's Autumn. It's Connecticut, in autumn, arguably the most lovely place on earth right now.

5. Family is there for each other.

So Monday evening we decide to take Tuesday-Thursday and make a trip to Connecticut.

We're working through our checklist - which includes finding the GPS. Chris says "it's in the mini-van" and so we wander over to grab it. I am watching Chris stick his hand through the window, and trying to make sense of what I am seeing as he says "look at this!" And still I am like "what?" Finally I realize that the sparkly stuff all around is shattered window glass and there is no GPS.

I just can't deal. If ever there is a doubt that I am Southern, it is erased by my next action...which is to say exactly this "I can't deal with this right now. Just leave it and I'll deal with it when we get back."

Moments later we are sorting through our mail as we enter our apartment and I spot a letter from the Arlington County Police Department - which essentially reads "we're sorry for your loss. We understand being a victim is difficult. However, we aren't going to do anything about it."

I'm "blink, blink, blink" for a moment as I try to figure out how they already have a police report for a crime we only just discovered. Then I realize that the apartment complex must have known about this, reported it (and surely ours was not the only vehicle involved), and then never bothered to tell us.

So, for one brief moment, I had this thought..."you have to stay home and fix this."

But I am still Southern and those roots are there and there strong. Some things really can wait. (post-post note: it is not "they are" strong...which Chris doesn't understand.)

So we packed up and drove to Connecticut. Top down for much of the drive. Chris went to the funeral while I went shopping. Even after 2.5 years together, 2 of them together on the same coast in the same apartment, he is still uncomfortable about being a man with a girlfriend. Although, to be fair usually his ex and his kids refer to me as "the Devil's Spawn" so girlfriend is marked improvement.

His sister, whom I love more every time I spend time with her, called him an idiot when she'd learned he wanted me to not go to the funeral, and ordered him to correct the situation. So in the midst of a lovely shopping outing my phone rang and the message came in to please come to the reception. I found my way back, meandered in, and was promptly introduced to about 2 dozen people before Angie (have I mentioned that I really love this woman) sat down with me and we had a nice few minutes of girltalk.

We spent much of the rest of the day with Angie, her amazingly talented husband, handsome and equally talented son, and her delightful daughter who just happens to be nearly exactly 1 month older than my own daughter.

While we were there the insurance claim on my laptop was settled so on our way back home we stopped at Best Buy and bought a new laptop for me. And one for Chris.

Then we drove through Connecticut, New York, and New Jersey with the top down.

Now I am very sick. Fever, hacking awful cough, and kleenex piled up all around sick. But it was worth it because in all of this I realized the following things.

1. I have my priorities straight and Connecticut in the autumn SHOULD be enjoyed with the top down, no matter what it costs you later.

2. Chris has truly wonderful siblings who don't seem to want anything more from me than to know who I am and that I love him. Which I do.

3. Theft is committed by people who believe they should not have to work for what they have - victims are those who believe they should be free to expect better behavior out of society. Victims aren't stupid, they are Americans actually trying to BE Americans. Thieves, on the other hand, should be shot immediately.

Oh, and one huge "Thank you" to Chris for running out at 11:30 PM last night to get me cough medicine and then for holding me through the night as we waited for that stupid fever to break.



NL